[ and he'll send his location to lan wangji with a ping of the gps on the watch.
mmmostly because, as lan wangji will soon come to find out, he's squirreled away in a little corner of the conservatory, a hidden nook under a peach tree. he's sitting cross-legged against the trunk, with one of the big rabbits in his lap as he pets it between the ears and strokes it's fur softly. ]
[ He doesn't answer the text seeing as there is no need, Lan Wangji already on his way. Navigating to the conservatory is simple enough, they visit it practically every day after all, and then once he finds the precise location he approaches quietly, watching from behind as he comes across Wei Wuxian petting the rabbit.
He isn't sure what to say, words of condolence are not a strength of his, so instead he speaks softly, calling out: ]
[ It is... a little absurd how much relief hits him, immediately, when he hears Lan Wangji's voice. He's been sitting here in his melancholy for a while now but when he hears his name, he looks up to the direction it comes from and it's like his whole body suddenly relaxes. ]
Lan Zhan...
[ He's going to heft up the rabbit from his lap and place it to the side then, pushing to his feet. He doesn't rush, doesn't move too fast, but he is purposeful in moving towards Lan Wangji and wrapping his arms around his shoulders in a hug, burying his face in against his neck. ]
[ Lan Wangji waits, a silent spectator as he allows Wei Wuxian the time necessary to respond, to either beckon him over or move to his side. He once waited sixteen years, what's another minute or two?
Once arms wrap tightly around him, he moves his own to do the same as the come to rest around Wei Wuxian's back, not tight enough to restrict him but still a solid enough weight to show that he is being held. Hugged. ]
....
[ There really isn't anything he can say, he cannot offer apologies for something he had no hand in, and nor can it bring someone back, so he just keeps his silence, offering a couple little rubs to the back of Wei Wuxian's shoulder blades. ]
[ The hug is warm and solid and enough for Wei Wuxian to relax into it. He sinks against Lan Wangji's body and closes his eyes, just letting the scent of sandalwood fill his nose and the warmth permeate his skin. This is what he needed, some sort of physical reassurance that the person he cares for the most is still here, still solid, still with him.
He mumbles against him, voice coming quietly. ]
I'm tired.
[ He nuzzles his face in against him and considers what else he's feeling, what else he wants to say.
Does he want to talk about how one of their last interactions was during his paranoid fever when he embarrassed himself so thoroughly? Or how Neuvillette was the first person here he had sex with, and helped him in his own way. That he was, admittedly, a crutch for Wei Wuxian when Lan Wangji wasn't here, a comforting presence and personality type for Wei Wuxian to lean against.
He's not sure. He's having a hard time picking any of it, so he just hugs Lan Wangji harder, like he wants to crawl inside of him and never come out. ]
[ Lan Wangji lets out a little huff of air as a hand gravitates towards Wei Wuxian's head, threading through strands of hair and just kind of petting it, keeping his head nicely nestled against his chest.
And then without warning he dips down, his other arm dropping from where it had been wrapped around his soulmate's waist, down to the back of his thighs and letting Lan Wangji hoist the other man up with one arm, after which he steps back towards the spot under the tree where the rabbit waits patiently, sinking down to a seated position beside it and Wei Wuxian now in his lap— free to either continue hugging if he wishes or to sit beside him, though he makes no move to get him to leave, still running fingers through his hair. ]
[ It's become less surprising over time to be picked up by Lan Wangji like this. So, he doesn't even let out a surprised noise when Lan Wangji scoops him, just curls into his arms and tightens his grip around his shoulders as he's held. And then he'll let the other man carry him to the spot he was settled in before, sinking down to the ground and when there, just shifting his legs so he's settled a bit more properly in Lan Wangji's lap. No, he has no intention to pull away from him.
His arms pull back to curl against Lan Wangji's chest and he closes his eyes, face tucked in against Lan Wangji's throat. He makes himself as small as possible in his attempt to curl up in Lan Wangji's lap. This is nice. This is what he wants.
He doesn't have anything to say yet, miraculously. He's still thinking on it. So, for now, he just continues cuddling Lan Wangji, soaking in the physical comfort. ]
[ They settle against the trunk of the tree and Lan Wangji wraps his arms around Wei Wuxian's back to hold him close once he knows the other has no intention of moving.
During times like this, he really begins to miss Wangji's presence, and the ability to play a song to calm and console. He could buy a generic guqin here, but even though the effect would not be as potent, it's a problem when you live in such a poor excuse for a room that there is literally no space for it, not even on the floor...
The rabbit embraces curiosity, hopping over once more and sniffing at the two of them and attempting to clamber over legs as Lan Wangji simply holds, and waits. ]
[ Wei Wuxian is simply letting himself be consoled, his face hidden in Lan Wangji's neck, his body curled against him. He has his eyes closed and is breathing quietly, trying to stifle the swirl of thoughts in his mind. The anxieties that pull at him. The reminder that this place is more dangerous than it lets on.
He's disturbed slightly by the rabbit, his face pulling back to look over at where he feels the shift of weight, the tug of clothing. He watches as the rabbit clambers over Lan Wangji's legs, settling against one of his ankles and tries chewing lightly at his robes. It makes Wei Wuxian huff a laugh and smile just a bit. ]
I wish we could take one of these rabbits back to our room.
[ Our room. Which one? Both? Either one? It is a mystery. ]
[ Tilting his head to see what caught Wei Wuxian's attention, it's followed up with him tightening his hold on the man in his lap, using it as a grounding weight as he tilts forward towards the rabbit, gently sliding a hand under it's belly to scoop it up before it ruins the fabric, then setting it right down between the two of them, allowing Wei Wuxian to properly pet it. ]
Mn. [ He agrees. He wants a rabbit! ] But our room does not have the space for one person. Nor two. Definitely not a rabbit.
[ "our room" ]
Perhaps the House shall grant one of us additional space. Or we request it.
[ Wei Wuxian will shift when Lan Wangji leans back again so the rabbit can sit comfortably between them but he can still curl against Lan Wangji's chest with his head on his shoulder. He'll softly pet the rabbit as it settles in the spot on their lap, letting the soft fur help him calm down just a bit. ]
Yeah... I know it's possible, but there's no instructions on how other than to participate in the game.
[ Have a bunch of sex with a lot of people, and you will one day be rewarded by an upgrade. Those are the guidelines Wei Wuxian has been given, which is why he's trying his best to do it. He wants them to be comfortable.
A sigh here and he closes his eyes, tilting his head upward to press his nose against Lan Wangji's throat. ]
When we go back home, I know you have to go back to Gusu but...
[ He should have expected that and he grimaces slightly as Lan Wangji encourages him to say what's on his mind. It's so embarrassing though, his fantasy, the things he wishes between them. What if Lan Wangji doesn't want that? What if he thinks Wei Wuxian is being silly?
Aghhhh. ]
I — sometimes I have these dreams...
[ He sounds so uncharacteristically nervous as he starts to explain himself. He looks down at the rabbit, fingers hesitating in their petting as he tries to find his words. ]
It's just, living with you lately has reminded me... It would be nice if that could — if we could — ahhh...
[ Get to the point, Wei Wuxian!! ]
Wh—what if we got a plot of land somewhere? And just... had a little farm. The two of us. And Little Apple! Maybe.
[ Oh, he just wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole, thanks. ]
[ Wei Ying has been thinking of them living together? Farming? Dreaming of it, or something similar?
He doesn't answer, only taking a few steady breaths, and it goes on for just long enough that it could be misinterpreted as Lan Wangji attempting to find the words to let him down gently, but it isn't that at all. He's already considering the logistics of it, where they could end up, balancing the responsibilities of being a Chief Cultivator and helping take care of his sect in his brother's self-inflicted seclusion, but ultimately it doesn't matter right now because this will happen.]
Efficient farmers begin at daybreak.
[ Wei Ying wanting to commit to being up mao shi every day? Be still he beating heart. ]
[ Wei Wuxian absolutely takes the silence as Lan Wangji trying to think of how to let him down gently. He panics a little, heartbeat speeding up and mortification rising. He didn't want to admit this, didn't want to be so vulnerable — but then again, if he can't be vulnerable with Lan Wangji, who can he be vulnerable with? He closes his eyes, trying to steady his own breathing as he braces himself for the rejection.
The rejection that does not come. Instead, there is Lan Wangji's voice, teasing him lightly and he's so surprised by it that he lets out a laugh, shocked.
He'll pull back his head to look up at Lan Wangji, to meet his eyes and smile, a little wobbly. ]
... Ah, well, maybe we can trade off duties?
[ Lan Wangji in the morning, Wei Wuxian does everything in the afternoon— ]
[ At least the straight face doesn't give away the mild panic within— is he submitting himself to a lifetime of overly spiced rice bowls?? ....He would do it, though. Hidden away on a quiet piece of land with the donkey, night hunting from time to time, just the two of them.
He looks up at last from the little spot over Wei Wuxian's shoulder where he had been staring to finally make eye contact, lips parting as he stares intently, as if he has more he wants to say....
But it doesnt come and his mouth closes, lips pressed together until he does finally speak. Not about how he really feels about it, the idea- the dream- of spending a life with awei Ying amd only Wei Ying, but instead something more practical. ]
I do not intend to do it forever. Chief Cultivator. It was necessary, but not desired.
[ He cannot run off to their honeymoon farm yet, even if he wants to. ]
[ The reply to that comes easily, excited even — ]
Of course!
[ Being able to cook for Lan Wangji would be such a dream. Waking up every day next to each other, cooking for each other, working the farm together, night hunting together. It would be a dream come true for Wei Wuxian and he knows it's such a silly desire, wanting to settle in one place and just have Lan Wangji at his side but... god, how he wants it.
When Lan Wangji lifts his head to look at Wei Wuxian, Wei Wuxian can only stare back, curiosity on his face as he waits for whatever it is that Lan Wangji wants to say. He can tell that he's thinking about it, about to speak before... he withdraws and doesn't say anything. It leaves Wei Wuxian puzzled. What could be on his mind?
But then he is speaking and Wei Wuxian decides this must be what he wanted to say, struggling to admit maybe. It would be a rejection of cultivation society in a way to admit that he didn't want the role, and Wei Wuxian can understand the difficulty behind putting words to that.
He always wondered why Lan Wangji accepted it. He was never one for politics. But he must have felt he had to, on some level. After everything with Jin Guangyao, he knows people craved the stability that would come from a Lan and Lan Xichen was indisposed so... Hm. ]
Yeah? [ Something giddy rises in him at that. ] And then you'll come back to me?
[ He finds someone right for the role, someone who could properly be the Chief Cultivator and give their time and energy to cultivation society. And then... then his life is his own again, and he is free to spend it wandering the countryside with Wei Wuxian again. ]
[ They never talked about it when it happened. How he stood there on that dirt track and looked Wei Wuxian in his watery eyes and announced that he would be staying. Not because he wanted to, but because he had to. A void in power and influence needed to be filled by someone who would not abuse it, who could actually provide guidance and support and be on the side of justice as they had once promised.
It really only left the Lan, but with Xichen broken by betrayal, he had no choice but to step into his place, to take on responsibility in his stead as duty and filial piety required it of him.
Of course Lan Wangji never talked about it, he never does, always acting on things yet rarely speaking a word of as to why, but perhaps because of their time spent here and the new type of closeness they share, the thought of mentioning it is not as absurd as it once was. ]
It was necessary. After Jin Guangyao, Jin Guangshang, the Chief Cultivator could not be a Jin. Nie Huaisang lacks both clan and public confidence, nor did he volunteer. Jiang Wanyin is Jiang Wanyin. Was assumed that Xiongzhang would assume the role.
[ Yet he remains in his self-imposed seclusion, for the foreseeable future. Wei Wuxian knows well enough the burden of duty to your family and your clan, how even if he wasn't asked to do it, Lan Wangji would have offered because that is what is expected of him, what is owed to the Lan.]
[ It was what was expected and honestly, Wei Wuxian knows that. Of the options available, there were so few that felt like they could assume the position and as Lan Wangji lays it out, Wei Wuxian nods his head and breathes out slowly, knowing the truth of his words even if he doesn't want them to be. There was no other option, other than to leave the power vacuum open. But there needs to be a Chief Cultivator, right? ... Right?
Of course, only Wei Wuxian would have that thought, his opinion of cultivation society is mixed and mostly negative. Maybe they would do well without a focal point of power for a bit, until they got their own affairs sorted and could be trusted to uplift someone into that position once again. That's his opinion on it, at least.
But no, Lan Wangji did the right thing by taking up the title. Even if it meant he could not be at Wei Wuxian's side any longer. It was upsetting, it's still upsetting, and all these months they've had together at the Golden Peacock has just made Wei Wuxian even more unhappy with not having Lan Wangji at his side back home.
If only Lan Xichen were able to take it up properly... ]
I understand. It makes sense, really. You were the only one who could at the time.
[ He goes quiet then, thinking. How in the world will they get Lan Wangji out of this role? ]
I will wait for you. When you're ready, I'll be there.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 03:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 04:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 04:40 am (UTC)[ So soon after losing another close friend. He knows his soulmate well enough to know that he must be feeling really down right now. ]
What do you require?
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 04:45 am (UTC)but it's lan wangji, so... he's allowed to feel what he feels, and right now he feels sad. ]
i don't know. a hug? hahaha. it feels strange to have become so attached to someone in such a short amount of time.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 04:54 am (UTC)Location? I will come to you.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 05:03 am (UTC)[ and he'll send his location to lan wangji with a ping of the gps on the watch.
mmmostly because, as lan wangji will soon come to find out, he's squirreled away in a little corner of the conservatory, a hidden nook under a peach tree. he's sitting cross-legged against the trunk, with one of the big rabbits in his lap as he pets it between the ears and strokes it's fur softly. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 05:18 am (UTC)He isn't sure what to say, words of condolence are not a strength of his, so instead he speaks softly, calling out: ]
Wei Ying?
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 05:29 am (UTC)Lan Zhan...
[ He's going to heft up the rabbit from his lap and place it to the side then, pushing to his feet. He doesn't rush, doesn't move too fast, but he is purposeful in moving towards Lan Wangji and wrapping his arms around his shoulders in a hug, burying his face in against his neck. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 05:48 am (UTC)Once arms wrap tightly around him, he moves his own to do the same as the come to rest around Wei Wuxian's back, not tight enough to restrict him but still a solid enough weight to show that he is being held. Hugged. ]
....
[ There really isn't anything he can say, he cannot offer apologies for something he had no hand in, and nor can it bring someone back, so he just keeps his silence, offering a couple little rubs to the back of Wei Wuxian's shoulder blades. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 07:15 pm (UTC)He mumbles against him, voice coming quietly. ]
I'm tired.
[ He nuzzles his face in against him and considers what else he's feeling, what else he wants to say.
Does he want to talk about how one of their last interactions was during his paranoid fever when he embarrassed himself so thoroughly? Or how Neuvillette was the first person here he had sex with, and helped him in his own way. That he was, admittedly, a crutch for Wei Wuxian when Lan Wangji wasn't here, a comforting presence and personality type for Wei Wuxian to lean against.
He's not sure. He's having a hard time picking any of it, so he just hugs Lan Wangji harder, like he wants to crawl inside of him and never come out. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 08:28 pm (UTC)And then without warning he dips down, his other arm dropping from where it had been wrapped around his soulmate's waist, down to the back of his thighs and letting Lan Wangji hoist the other man up with one arm, after which he steps back towards the spot under the tree where the rabbit waits patiently, sinking down to a seated position beside it and Wei Wuxian now in his lap— free to either continue hugging if he wishes or to sit beside him, though he makes no move to get him to leave, still running fingers through his hair. ]
If you are tired, rest. I am here.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-08 09:04 pm (UTC)His arms pull back to curl against Lan Wangji's chest and he closes his eyes, face tucked in against Lan Wangji's throat. He makes himself as small as possible in his attempt to curl up in Lan Wangji's lap. This is nice. This is what he wants.
He doesn't have anything to say yet, miraculously. He's still thinking on it. So, for now, he just continues cuddling Lan Wangji, soaking in the physical comfort. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-09 03:40 am (UTC)During times like this, he really begins to miss Wangji's presence, and the ability to play a song to calm and console. He could buy a generic guqin here, but even though the effect would not be as potent, it's a problem when you live in such a poor excuse for a room that there is literally no space for it, not even on the floor...
The rabbit embraces curiosity, hopping over once more and sniffing at the two of them and attempting to clamber over legs as Lan Wangji simply holds, and waits. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 01:54 am (UTC)He's disturbed slightly by the rabbit, his face pulling back to look over at where he feels the shift of weight, the tug of clothing. He watches as the rabbit clambers over Lan Wangji's legs, settling against one of his ankles and tries chewing lightly at his robes. It makes Wei Wuxian huff a laugh and smile just a bit. ]
I wish we could take one of these rabbits back to our room.
[ Our room. Which one? Both? Either one? It is a mystery. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 03:05 am (UTC)Mn. [ He agrees. He wants a rabbit! ] But our room does not have the space for one person. Nor two. Definitely not a rabbit.
[ "our room" ]
Perhaps the House shall grant one of us additional space. Or we request it.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 03:14 am (UTC)Yeah... I know it's possible, but there's no instructions on how other than to participate in the game.
[ Have a bunch of sex with a lot of people, and you will one day be rewarded by an upgrade. Those are the guidelines Wei Wuxian has been given, which is why he's trying his best to do it. He wants them to be comfortable.
A sigh here and he closes his eyes, tilting his head upward to press his nose against Lan Wangji's throat. ]
When we go back home, I know you have to go back to Gusu but...
[ . . . ]
No, nevermind. Ignore me.
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 04:17 am (UTC)but......
.....but???
Lan Wangji waits in silence, almost as still as the trunk of the tree they rest against as he waits for the rest of that sentence that never comes. ]
...You have something on your mind. Speak it. You need not silence yourself before me.
[ Tell me. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 04:26 am (UTC)Aghhhh. ]
I — sometimes I have these dreams...
[ He sounds so uncharacteristically nervous as he starts to explain himself. He looks down at the rabbit, fingers hesitating in their petting as he tries to find his words. ]
It's just, living with you lately has reminded me... It would be nice if that could — if we could — ahhh...
[ Get to the point, Wei Wuxian!! ]
Wh—what if we got a plot of land somewhere? And just... had a little farm. The two of us. And Little Apple! Maybe.
[ Oh, he just wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole, thanks. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 04:38 am (UTC)[ Wei Ying has been thinking of them living together? Farming? Dreaming of it, or something similar?
He doesn't answer, only taking a few steady breaths, and it goes on for just long enough that it could be misinterpreted as Lan Wangji attempting to find the words to let him down gently, but it isn't that at all. He's already considering the logistics of it, where they could end up, balancing the responsibilities of being a Chief Cultivator and helping take care of his sect in his brother's self-inflicted seclusion, but ultimately it doesn't matter right now because this will happen.]
Efficient farmers begin at daybreak.
[ Wei Ying wanting to commit to being up mao shi every day? Be still he beating heart. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 04:45 am (UTC)The rejection that does not come. Instead, there is Lan Wangji's voice, teasing him lightly and he's so surprised by it that he lets out a laugh, shocked.
He'll pull back his head to look up at Lan Wangji, to meet his eyes and smile, a little wobbly. ]
... Ah, well, maybe we can trade off duties?
[ Lan Wangji in the morning, Wei Wuxian does everything in the afternoon— ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 09:43 pm (UTC)[ At least the straight face doesn't give away the mild panic within— is he submitting himself to a lifetime of overly spiced rice bowls?? ....He would do it, though. Hidden away on a quiet piece of land with the donkey, night hunting from time to time, just the two of them.
He looks up at last from the little spot over Wei Wuxian's shoulder where he had been staring to finally make eye contact, lips parting as he stares intently, as if he has more he wants to say....
But it doesnt come and his mouth closes, lips pressed together until he does finally speak. Not about how he really feels about it, the idea- the dream- of spending a life with awei Ying amd only Wei Ying, but instead something more practical. ]
I do not intend to do it forever. Chief Cultivator. It was necessary, but not desired.
[ He cannot run off to their honeymoon farm yet, even if he wants to. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-15 11:12 pm (UTC)Of course!
[ Being able to cook for Lan Wangji would be such a dream. Waking up every day next to each other, cooking for each other, working the farm together, night hunting together. It would be a dream come true for Wei Wuxian and he knows it's such a silly desire, wanting to settle in one place and just have Lan Wangji at his side but... god, how he wants it.
When Lan Wangji lifts his head to look at Wei Wuxian, Wei Wuxian can only stare back, curiosity on his face as he waits for whatever it is that Lan Wangji wants to say. He can tell that he's thinking about it, about to speak before... he withdraws and doesn't say anything. It leaves Wei Wuxian puzzled. What could be on his mind?
But then he is speaking and Wei Wuxian decides this must be what he wanted to say, struggling to admit maybe. It would be a rejection of cultivation society in a way to admit that he didn't want the role, and Wei Wuxian can understand the difficulty behind putting words to that.
He always wondered why Lan Wangji accepted it. He was never one for politics. But he must have felt he had to, on some level. After everything with Jin Guangyao, he knows people craved the stability that would come from a Lan and Lan Xichen was indisposed so... Hm. ]
Yeah? [ Something giddy rises in him at that. ] And then you'll come back to me?
[ He finds someone right for the role, someone who could properly be the Chief Cultivator and give their time and energy to cultivation society. And then... then his life is his own again, and he is free to spend it wandering the countryside with Wei Wuxian again. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-16 03:32 am (UTC)It really only left the Lan, but with Xichen broken by betrayal, he had no choice but to step into his place, to take on responsibility in his stead as duty and filial piety required it of him.
Of course Lan Wangji never talked about it, he never does, always acting on things yet rarely speaking a word of as to why, but perhaps because of their time spent here and the new type of closeness they share, the thought of mentioning it is not as absurd as it once was. ]
It was necessary. After Jin Guangyao, Jin Guangshang, the Chief Cultivator could not be a Jin. Nie Huaisang lacks both clan and public confidence, nor did he volunteer. Jiang Wanyin is Jiang Wanyin. Was assumed that Xiongzhang would assume the role.
[ Yet he remains in his self-imposed seclusion, for the foreseeable future. Wei Wuxian knows well enough the burden of duty to your family and your clan, how even if he wasn't asked to do it, Lan Wangji would have offered because that is what is expected of him, what is owed to the Lan.]
no subject
Date: 2025-06-18 04:15 am (UTC)Of course, only Wei Wuxian would have that thought, his opinion of cultivation society is mixed and mostly negative. Maybe they would do well without a focal point of power for a bit, until they got their own affairs sorted and could be trusted to uplift someone into that position once again. That's his opinion on it, at least.
But no, Lan Wangji did the right thing by taking up the title. Even if it meant he could not be at Wei Wuxian's side any longer. It was upsetting, it's still upsetting, and all these months they've had together at the Golden Peacock has just made Wei Wuxian even more unhappy with not having Lan Wangji at his side back home.
If only Lan Xichen were able to take it up properly... ]
I understand. It makes sense, really. You were the only one who could at the time.
[ He goes quiet then, thinking. How in the world will they get Lan Wangji out of this role? ]
I will wait for you. When you're ready, I'll be there.